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Follow the Science!

“So it’s easy to criticize,” Fauci added. “But they’re really criticizing science, because I represent science. That’s dangerous.”

In the years of the plague came an emissary from the capital to the hinterlands, journeying along neglected roads.

“Greetings, O Emissary!” called a village headman. “Is this the year the fabled power is restored?”

“No, my rustic friend. Be patient. For the Holy See warns of a new variant troubling this fallen world.”

“O, Emissary! But the children hunger and shiver–“

“Silence! Do you question the science?!”

Trembling, the headman fell to his knees and repeatedly struck his forehead against the earthen floor.

“No, O, Emissary! I follow the science! And I revere the emissary of the See of St. Fauci, which represents the science!”

“Be still, then,” the emissary cautioned. “And don five masks in penance!”